Gotta get up and try, try, try.

HELLOOO!

heeee yes, I dip-dyed my hair red :P And im so happeh about it cause everyone says it looks nice on me :D

Anyway, these days, ive met a number of new people. And im so glad I did. People say I amaze them with my inner strength and the immortal smile on my face :)

It makes me happy. 

But I'm not that strong. I break down sometimes. I drag myself to move on. I tend to fall everytime I move on but the people around me helped me through lotsa bad times. I know I cant depend on them all the time. So that's why I'm trying hard to move on myself. 

However, it's always 1 step forward, 2 step back. 2 step forward and 1 step back. I always end up in the same position. It sounds stupid. But at least I'm trying. 

People tell ask me how can I be so noble?
In every sense.

As a future mother, to go through all these pain.
As a lover, to let go someone I love just to make them happy.
As a friend, who rather go through emotional pain and keep quiet.

Simple.
I want the people I love to be happy.

No matter what, it makes me happy to see the people I love happy.
It's worth it.
Really.

I have to accept the fact that life is about not getting the things we want.

To be honest, I do get pissed off with God sometimes. I'm angry on why I should be in physical and mental pain ALL THE TIME. But i guess God is fair. I hope He is. I really hope He is.

I just wanna be truly happy after all these pain.

I guess after so much obstacles, I've learnt alot. On how to appreciate people more. And how to not let history repeat again. I won't. 

Cause I don't wanna get hurt anymore. I've gone through alot of pain. I know how it feels. but anyway, whats life without some downs? 

:)

Till then,