So, my life is so happening right now, BUT, not in a good way because I've been so busy that I think I'm ignoring my health again and as usual, my mom starts to nag nag nag AND NAG at me about my one and only kidney and stuff like that.
Sometimes, I wish I could just die earlier or something, then I won't burden other people. I've trying to live really positively. Although every night is still miserable for me. And I still do have nightmares. But oh well, hopefully nightmares remains as nightmares.
So, today i had Performance Lab exam where we are graded as a band and stuff like that. We totally SCREWED IT UP. like TOTALLY. Sigh.
Responsibilities. Practices. Teamwork.
3 things that our band is lack of.
But, nonetheless, I'm glad its over. Here's a picture of it! :D
Also, my hands were trembling during the performance D: And all I was thinking of is someone's voice saying that "Don't be afraid. Just do your best. I know you can do it. Do it for me. Just think of me."
YES YES. It's my own imagination.
Well, hopefully I don't fail this shit man. I want to move on as soon as possible. I don't want to repeat any semester not because I'm embarrassed or whatsoever. Just cause I can't wait to leave Malaysia although i know I will miss everything and everyone. BUT, I just can't wait for a change in my life Cause its such a mess right now. My health too :( it happens. all the time whenever I'm stressed up. uteri hurts, backbone hurts etc. I need to do some relaxing thing shit man.
My body and mind is too fatigue.
So yeah, enough of ranting and back to studying because I'm having some stupid exam tomorrow AND, Monday will be the last exam for my piano performance. Ugh.
Screw this shit.
Ciao!
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