*sighhhh*

i'm sorry people... i dunno why.. its weird.. usually my mood will recover the most in a few hours... but... almost 24 hours had passed.. and i'm still moodless.. not moodless.. shorter to say, i'm not over it yet...

just now, when i was talking to Sheau Hwa on the phone.. she asked me, why i sound so down?? well i try to sound my best, but i didnt know that my best sound down.... well, if they say i sound down, they will be shocked to see my pale face with red bruised eyes... my eyes is still bruise from yesterday incident... i dunno why i cant take it... not like its world's end.. not like someone had died... not like i'm getting some cannot.be.cured sickness...

why am i so not over about this??

well, maybe because it comes one after another... small things, but comes one after another... i told him about it, and guessed wat he said?? "just like that?? u cry just like that?? you should be tough...."

i dunno wat to say.. so i just said.. "obviously i didnt cry JUST because of that.. i already had a bad day, but he made it worst.."

but u know wat?? i want to tell him..
"wat do u mean by that?? u dun even understand my situation, you dun even know how it feels for me, u dun even know wat they said, wat they did.. and u ask me to tough???"

well... but, of course, if u guys know wat actually happened, i think u guys will bang ur head on the wall and say "just like that??" well i can predict wat each of u will say...

sheau hwa: aiyohhh.. just dun care la... dun be stupid la.... (and she will start her lecture)

emily/pui yi: just like that?? *gives a disgusted look* , i dun think i will be like that just because.....

niro:aiyo.... sandra... dun be so emo di la... nevermindd la...

siew jin: hmm... actually they shouldnt do that... ... .... ...

pinky: *no comments*

low: *no comments* but if i insisit..... she will say.. aiyo.. nevermind la.. just like.. dun care la...

well ade already said.. cause she already know wat happen.. but she practically has no comment also... cause she dunno wat to say ady...

i feel like slapping myself for being like that... i dunno.. i have no mood at all.. i may be okay, from the outside.. but not the inside.. so many ppl hurt me.. so many close ones.. except for my beloved besties... and of course my pet-siblings... but i dun really look okay from the outside also.. i've been talking very harsh to my parents.. for no reason.. getting mad, for no reason.. but i.just.cant.control.myself...... i'm like purposely making them angry.. like challenging them being angry.. but, to my surprise.. they didnt get angry as i thought... they just kept queit... i'm like annoyed by watever ppl say... just wanna shut myself...

hopefully... u guys can cheer me... *sigh*

oh, and sorry to the ppl who talked to me, but i got angry like super fast and merajuk-ed at u guys... told you, i'm having a bad day.... u know who u are... i know u are reading my blog... u're also my friend also okay... but i was annoyed.. duh.. i was annoyed with practically everyone in the whole world, except my dog, he's not even a human...

today morning.. i had chinese class with jamie and joanne (janice's sisters) and alex... they were very funny.. cause like joanne and alex kept copying the answers from me and jamie and our chinese teacher was like shaking her head ady...

back to emo, shockingly, i dun even have mood to sms anyone.. usually.. i cant leave without smsing... but.. of course, if u talk to me through msn, u wont even know how sad am i.. okay.. i got to stop blogging bout my emo stuff ady.. cause my dear sister, melvin said my blog is already damn emo...

btw, siew jin, hope you will recover soon from ur sickness.. kay kay???