Not anyone.

I dunno why, I just have the give up feeling..

my mom says I dont study..

fine.

I feel pity for her. She has a daughter who doesnt study at all. I feel so sad for her. hmm. . . .

I was actually darn angry.. but second thought, "whatever.. I dun care.., let her think what she wants.."

so yesterday, when I reached home.. I just sleep.. sleep.. sleep.. and today morning.. woke up at 9 something.. did i dunno what.. delete all my messages.. which consist about 700 messages.. so yeah.. after that, went for brunch.. came back.. continue sleeping.. sleep.. sleep.. sleep NON STOP...

woke up.. gave a call to siewjin and complain to her yada yada yada.. and got to know Professor Potato didnt go to school too.. goshhh.. so worried la dei.. . . .haizzzzz

then, I continue eating.. and sleeping.. and eat and sleep and just dun care what is going on around the world.. all I know is just that stupid Doumyouji's mother is stupidly annoying.. wanna kill her for making Tsukushi suffer.. ugh! and that stupid sakurako is DAMN ANNOYING can die... so fake lar her..

yeah.. so the wholeeee dayyy i didnt study AT ALL... . . . ugh.... .. . .

then, halfway watching hana yori dango, I got an sms from my lil' bro.. and he asked me to read "someone's" blog.. I thought what will happen.. sure those little little things again that made him so down.. I was like swearing I would go straight to her and scold her if SOMETHING BAD happen again.. . .. but, when i read her blog.. at first, I got angry with all those F words around.. I was like, "what kind of girl is this...?" BUT.. .. .. later on... .. . . i went,

"WHAT THE HELL?! GOSH!!! and I say I'm such a good "sister" that's what I was thinking..

I know nothing about them now.. I feel like I'm so useless, I know nothing.., dunno what is going on.. I feel like I have changed a lot.. I use to care a lot about other ppl.. I thought I still care a lot about ppl.. but, actually, i just dont know what is going on..

I feel so bad.. I'm sorry i wasnt there for YOU GUYSSSSSSS. .. . . . i'm sorry I'm so blur about everything..

I just can't help anyone, can I?

not you,

not him,

not her,

not anyone.

all the words like, "I'll be there for you.."

Dont you think its fake?

sobs..

I'm sorry I didnt keep my promise.

I'm just a stupid self- centred bastard

AND a jerk.

I'm happy all the time without knowing ALL of you are sad.

No one's telling me anything.

*sigh*