Ouch.

Actually, I dont plan to blog today, because I have nothing to blog about. Nothing. The whole day, there's

No "laughing like shit"
No "jakuning"
No "crapping"
No "making the whole class laugh"

Nothing.

All I did today was slept from assembly till 9am. Woke up and start doing all my work non stop. NON-STOP.

Quote Chu: Sandra, why are you so quiet today? It's so abnormal for you.

Quote Yuenping: Sandra, pls talk.. The class is so dull without your voice ringing in our ears, echoing around these 4 walls.

Quote Low: Sandraaa arr, hyper a bit laa..

Quote Sh: you okay arrr????

Quote Siewjin: Sandra, why are you so quiet?

Quote JO EE, i repeat, JO EE!: Why are you so mood today?

QUOTE PUAN ANGELA: why do you look so moody and dull today?

She was like smiling and asking me questions, usually i would answer enthusiastically but today, hmm. I just answered one word per question.

I answered ALL their questions with 3 words which was, "I'm just tired."

Today is the day i broke my record. I barely utter 100 words in school. and yeah, that is something DIFFERENT. VERY, in fact.

But, I did smile, a bit. To not scare the ppl around me. Me not talking is already scary enough. If i dont smile, Godknowswhatwillbetheirreaction.

well, I smiled for all the photos we took with the Indonesian students. It's their last day. But the smiles are all fake. The truth is, I dun even wanna use my muscles to SMILE. cause i dun have the mood to.

ouchhh, it's not the migraine I'm having that hurts me now. It's the small tiny invisible knife stabbed through my heart for hurting you. I'm sorry.

Look to the clock on the wall,
Hands hardly moving at all.
Can't stand the state that I'm in
Sometimes it feels like the walls closing in

How rules can I break
how many lies can I make
how many roads can I turn
to find me a place where the bridge doesn't burn


Lesson learnt: Shut up when its time to shut up.

btw, yesterday's post coming up.